As you may recall from the posts back before Christmas, I did not find this relocation easy. Being without children to ferry to and from school and band practice and sports events meant that I actually only needed a car to go shopping. I didn’t really need to go out either. Worse, I was really scared about driving and was secretly glad we did not get a car til four months in.
Then my parents came to visit, and the place began to feel like home. As soon as I became tour guide I began to settle in a bit. I was brave enough to start driving, partly because I had to take them out, but mostly because I would not be alone in the car.
Two weeks later and I had a long trip planned to Europe and the FIGT conference in Washington and was delighted to have a massive excuse not to try and drive on my own quite yet. Telling people I ‘lived in KL now’ began to roll off the tongue.
Anyway, to cut a long story short, our 21-year-old, Joshua, has decided to join us here for a while. I actually wrote ‘come home’ just then, but decided to write ‘join us here’ instead. You see, though the city is now Ian and my home, how can I expect our son, who has never been here before to call it that? It’s not his home, is it? The house we own in the Hague is rented out now. We don’t own another property. Joshua does not have a bedroom here. Our single spare room is set aside for any guests who visit – and that includes our children.
However, he’s here on and off til October and of course I am delighted. I notice he has already moved the furniture about in the spare room and stuck pictures on the wall. When his brother, Sam, joins us in August, they will have to share it. When he leaves again it won’t be his room any more. When additional guests come, he will have to sleep on the sofa.
Oh s**t, OUR CHILDREN HAVE NO HOME has been screaming at me for the last few weeks and I feel bad. This thought never crossed my mind when we packed up our flat in Holland eight months ago.
Like I said, we never expected our nest to refill, albeit for a short time, but along with the joy of having a driving buddy, who makes me braver about going further and venturing to places I have never even heard of, comes thoughts of home, for him, for me, for all of us and wondering how much it matters. I’d love to know what you think.